Men now want bride price as reward for good behaviour by wives, study by Mwelekeo Insights reveal

A new report by Mwelekeo Insights shows that men now want bride price be a reward for good behaviour by their wives, rather than a traditional prerequisite for marriage, and the results are stirring conversations across the country.

The findings show that an overwhelming 89% of participants endorsed the idea that bride price should be a husband’s reward for his wife’s good behaviour, not an upfront payment demanded before marriage begins.

Additionally, Mwelekeo Insights poll data shows that only 29% support women taking over the roles of paying for dowry when their husbands aren’t in a position to, while 71% oppose the idea, arguing that it will erode the traditions and cultures where men are expected to be in charge.

While at it, 48% of the respondents endorse the idea of having dowry payment abolished in today’s society, while 51% of the respondents feel that bride price as a tradition cannot be done away with. 65% of men feel the bride price should be a shared thing due to the prevailing economic situation, while 35% feel men should take responsibility.

Many of the respondents expressed the view that marriage should be a partnership, and as such, bride price should reflect mutual respect over time rather than a transactional cost paid at the beginning.

A high majority of those surveyed also supported the idea that bride price should be gradually paid throughout the marriage period. This approach, they said, would relieve men of the pressure to make large payments before they are financially stable, which they believe contributes to delayed marriages and even broken engagements.

According to some participants, stretching out the payment also allows the couple to grow together and deepen their bond while managing responsibilities jointly.

Still, not all respondents agreed. About 17% of those surveyed said that bride price should remain a one-time payment. They argued that it is a meaningful tradition and that changing it would dilute its cultural significance. This group believed that modern challenges should not lead to abandoning practices that have defined marriage in Kenyan society for generations.

Even as opinions vary, the poll reveals a strong appetite for reform. For many of the respondents, rewarding behaviour rather than fulfilling a financial requirement at the outset represents a more balanced and respectful foundation for marriage. Mwelekeo Insights’ findings highlight the changing views of a generation navigating tradition and modern reality.